Questions About God You're Afraid to Ask, and Where to Take Them

Picture a man who has sat in church for twenty years and still could not tell you what separates the Old Testament from the New. He never asked. Early on it seemed too basic, and later everyone around him seemed to know, so he nodded along.

You may be that man, or close to him. Some questions are small, like what "grace" actually means, and some are heavy, like "If God is good, why did my sister die?" Both go unasked for the same reason: we worry what the asking will make us look like.

In short

Questions about God, basic or painful, are welcome. Scripture is full of people asking them, often to God's face, and Jesus answered sincere questions patiently. The best place to take yours is a trusted pastor or Christian friend. If you are not ready for that, writing the question down, praying it, or asking it privately first can help you find the words.

The questions people carry

A handful, in the words people tend to use.

Who wrote the Bible, and how do we know it was not just made up? What does it mean to be saved, and am I? Why does God seem so angry in the Old Testament? If I have doubts, am I still a Christian? Why doesn't God answer my prayers? What happens to people who never heard of Jesus? I did something terrible years ago. Can God really forgive that? What is the Holy Spirit, exactly?

If one of them made you stop reading, you are in good company, since serious Christians have asked every one of these for centuries and thoughtful answers exist for each.

The Bible is full of questions

We tend to picture faithful people as the ones who never wonder. Scripture does not.

Job asks God why he was ever born. Habakkuk asks how long God will put up with injustice. In Mark 9 a father brings his son to Jesus, admits his faith is shaky, and Jesus heals the boy anyway. Many of the Psalms are laments, blunt complaints that ask "Why?" and "How long?"

Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts before Him. God is our refuge. Selah

— Psalm 62:8 (BSB)

That verse invites you to pour out your heart in whatever state it is in, which includes the question you would be embarrassed to voice in a small group.

Even Jesus asks one from the cross, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?" He is quoting Psalm 22, and he does not seem embarrassed to ask.

Why we stay quiet

If questions are welcome, why do so many go unasked?

Some of us think we should already know, especially if we grew up in church, and past a certain age asking what the Trinity is feels like confessing you were not paying attention. Others are afraid of the answer: whether God can forgive what we did is too heavy to say out loud in case the answer is no. A few were brushed off once, handed a verse and a frown, and learned not to try again. And plenty of us have no pastor we know and no friend who would not make it awkward.

All of that is understandable, and the question does not get lighter by carrying it alone.

How God answers a sincere question

The New Testament describes a God who does not get irritated by questions.

Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

— James 1:5 (BSB)

James wrote to Christians under pressure, and the promise he gives them is that God does not scold the person who asks.

A question differs from a demand, of course. Asking "Why?" with an open hand is prayer, and asking it to tell God he has failed you is something else. Even then, the Psalms show him listening to people at their angriest.

Where to take your questions

A pastor who knows you is usually the best first stop. Many pastors enjoy these conversations more than you would expect. If you worry about wasting their time, tell them so.

A mature Christian friend can be just as good, particularly when the question is tangled up with your own story. Pick someone who listens before answering.

A class built for questions, like an Alpha course or a newcomers' class, lets you ask the basics in a room of people asking them too. Books help when a question needs depth, and a good pastor can name one.

Sometimes you need to say it privately first, just to learn what you are really asking. That is part of why we built Delighting. You can type the question exactly as it sits in your head, at whatever hour it surfaces, and get an answer that starts from Scripture and shows its sources. It is an AI, not a pastor. Use it to find the words, then take the question to people who know you.

You also do not need to settle every question before you pray or go to church. Plenty of people hold an open question for years and keep showing up. Belief is not certainty, and God does not ask for certainty before you come to him.

What to do with the answer

A good answer often raises a further question. Read the passages behind it yourself, and write down what shifted and what still does not sit right; the journal is a good place for that. Take whatever stays unresolved to God in prayer, and to a person.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my concerns.

— Psalm 139:23 (BSB)

That prayer fits questions too, because it asks God to search out what lies underneath the one you are asking. A question about suffering is sometimes a question about whether he sees you.

If your question comes out of a dark place and you are thinking about harming yourself, please talk to someone right now. In the United States you can call or text 988 at any hour, and our crisis resources page has more options.

Where to begin today

1. Write your question in one sentence, exactly as you would say it to no one.
2. Pray it aloud if you can, as plainly as you wrote it.
3. Tell one person this week that you have a question about God. If you want to find the words first, ask it here, or read Is it OK to doubt God?.